The King speaks – Avatar

The King speaks

“The King is now stepping out into the balcony,
to the cheers of the crowd.
He is wearing the royal cape and crown,
and seems to be in good health.
His mustache is in excellent condition
this morning, which of course is a good sign
for an early spring.
He is now getting ready to speak.”
[The King speaks]
My dear citizens
Today is a great day for me, and therefore,
of course, for the whole kingdom.
I have the great privilege to announce
that the royal enema has been carried through
with success, and that my Majesty
is no longer constipated.

Naturally, this is particularly good
news for the peasantry
in our beautiful country, and we ought to expect
excellent productivity out of the fields.
Furthermore
I took a bath this morning. The crowd cheers.
The bath was warm, dignified, and reinvigorating
And I look forward to see what
the Royal Brewery will be able to achieve
with my Majesty’s royal residue.
Very well, that was all for today.
Now, it’s time for volleyball.
Live well, my citizens.
God save the King.”